My daily struggle


There are some things you only worry about if you have a mysterious lawnmowing visitor who seems to strike on an unpredictable but repeating basis. For me, it’s concern that the gnome might strike my newly reseeded lawn and swallow up seeds in a vacuum vortex of misdirected charity. And I can’t mow myself as a signal to the gnome, because that would be just as destructive.

For awhile I considered putting a sign up which said:

To THOSE who would MOW my LAWN
you may resume doing so on or after
24 AUGUST 2002
—the management

But I suspect this would only further convince my neighbors I’m a crackpot.

Thankfully kakumei has a manual push-mower that I had the bright idea to borrow; assuming it’ll fit in my car it would be a perfect solution: lawn can be mowed non-destructively, and there will the presence of freshly cut grass to act as bane for my mysterious benefactor.


Daily observation: A five pound bag of Wonka Runts from Costco contains a crapload of Runts. I thank my coworkers’ gluttony, my only hope for the eventual disappearance of this sugary stockpile.

Song of the day: David Byrne and Marisa Monte, “Waters of March”

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  • Ilea

    You know, I wish I had a mysterious good Samaritan that would show up each day at work and DO MY F*%#ING JOB! But by not showing up, they just prove they're smarter than I am... *sigh*...

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