Column: Selva's Basement: A GNE Chatlog

Several players have wondered whether the new GNE chat application is merely stand-alone or is in fact a section of the real game. If it is a part of the real game, where are the toys, the items? Why cant we see anything?

This GNE chat thing is actually an instance of a puzzle genre known as the locked-room. We are given few clues as to where we are or why we are there. Is there perhaps a lightswitch? Is this perhaps Selva’s basement?

Abulafia: Maybe we’re in Selva’s house. Let’s see of we can get into the basement.
capodistria: ok. we need to find a light switch
bhikku: Selva’s here tho - be very quiet
bhikku: She might think you’re after the jam
Abulafia: SELVA!!!!! Wake Up!
Kit Panther: selva???
Kit Panther: HEY all!!!
capodistria: but i am after the jam!!
Kit Panther: Cap!
capodistria: kit!
neddles: Kit!
bhikku: what flavour?
Kit Panther: neddles!
Kit Panther: I’m here!
Abulafia: Elderberry
Kit Panther: brb….
Kit Panther: /me is afk
neddles: How did you get into Selva’s basement, Kit?
bhikku: What’s this thing with the straps?
bhikku: someone turn the goddam light on
capodistria: ha! we should refer to this from now on as “selva’s basement”
bhikku: oo, pickles!
Abulafia: Oops. Busted.
Abulafia: They shouldn’t have put a great big GNE logo on this.
neddles: Seconds capo’s motion…oops, Selva left.
bhikku: anyone want a beet?
capodistria: she knows how to get out
capodistria: anyone see which way she went?
neddles: I was considering leaving myself when bhikku started smothering beets with elderberry jam.
capodistria: yum
capodistria: i think
neddles: You mean you haven’t tried it yet?
bhikku: gherkins are good too
capodistria: mmm. elderberry beets
capodistria: just the words sound edible
Abulafia: Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelled of borscht
bhikku: I think I just ate a jellyfish…
bhikku: possibly one of Selv’s specimens
Abulafia: Hrm. If Plurp shows up, we’re in trouble. Hide the chickens.
Kit Panther: ooh I like it here.
bhikku: so we’re stuck in here for the forseeable?
bhikku: we’ll go stir crazy im tellin ya
bhikku: We all scream for ice cream!!
Kit Panther: *is eating ice cream*
neddles: Mmmmm, beet icecream!
bhikku: (waits for brekko to arrive)
bhikku: oo, good one neds, very marketable
bhikku: what flavour, Kit?
capodistria: they sell that in japan i think
bhikku: do they?
capodistria: i bet yes!
bhikku: and the slogan?
neddles: *sigh*..got to get back to work for a bit, catch yoy guys later :o)…hi Samantha, bye Samantha!
capodistria: you cant beat beets?
Samantha: Hello, everyone (at least the couple of you I know)
bhikku: seeya ned!
bhikku: naw, in Engrish..
capodistria: hi sam!
bhikku: You and Me Beeting Off, or something…
capodistria: ahh of course
Abulafia: Oooh, uh, yeah…
Abulafia: I’ll just be shuffling off to this side of the basement now.
bhikku: Careful of the mop.
capodistria: beat me, I scream?
bhikku: Oops no, that’s Selva’s nude scarecrow
Abulafia: What’s this rubber thingy for, I wonder.
Samantha: *LOL at the banter* Man, I’ve missed you guys…
capodistria: *models clown wig for samantha*
Abulafia: Welcome to another installment of Beet Banter, with your host Bhikku!
Samantha: Ooooh… sexy….
Abulafia: Bhikku’s Beet Banter™
bhikku: Lets Get Rooty!
Abulafia: Radical, dude!
OldTasty: I dig you…
bhikku: (makes with the old rooty-toot)
Abulafia: Nice of you to turnip.
bhikku: here we go…
bhikku: *rolls eyes*
Samantha: Just popped in to say hi and check out the chat. And groan at a few puns. Off to bed now. See you guys soon.
Abulafia: We’re driving them off, Mr. Mojo Rhisome.
bhikku: Yup, I better go too. Scrambled eggs are in the offing.
bhikku: *groans at Ab*
bhikku: later all :-)
Abulafia: Bye!
capodistria: bye b
capodistria: ok. everyone else figured out how to get out of here
Abulafia: I fink I’ll call it a noit, ‘swell.
Kit Panther: ok, I have to eat dinner.
capodistria: aha eating!
Abulafia: Yes. The sign off button does it.
capodistria: that too!
Abulafia: Watch…
capodistria: so obvious…
capodistria: and yet…
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